杨春吉

Mr. Wang is my favorite teacher. English is my favorite subject. I like English the best. Mr. Wang looks very thin and tall， but① he is outgoing and humorous. His class is very interesting and lively. We all like English class.

Once he asked me to go to his office， for my English is poor. He let me sit in his chair and asked about my English study careful②. Also he asked how I could studied English. We talked for a long time. At last I knew what my weakness was. How patient and kind teacher③ he is！ From now④ on， I was interested in English and I improved it a lot.

One day when I meet him， I will say “Thank you very much！” to him.

山东省临沂市临沂国际学校初一（1）班 尤舒雅

点评

1. 优点：

本文表达自然流畅，结构严谨，要点全面。小作者对英语老师的感激之情跃然纸上。习作运用了and， but， for等表示层次性的并列连词；还运用了感叹句、宾语从句、时间状语从句等，使文章层次井然，浑然一体。尽管有少量错误，但瑕不掩玉，足以体现出小作者扎实的写作功底。

2. 需要修改之处：

① but改为and。前后句是并列关系，并非转折关系；

② careful改为carefully。修饰动词要用副词；

③ 前面加a。这里how引导的感叹句结构是How + 形容词+a/ an+可数名词单数+主语+谓语；

④ now改为then。from now on的意思是“从现在起”，from then on才是“自那时起”的意思。

3. 评分：

根据中考英语作文满分15分的评分标准，本文修改前可得12分。