于琰

I am reminded the dove is often heard before

it is seen， reminded that the rifle1 is an extension of

the man. I am reminded of so much this morning，

the weight of the rifle awkward in my hands.

Lock the target， sense the line2， let the gun

do its job. Must everything in life

sound so mystical？ Out in the field

two wild turkeys mope and saunter；3

they know we are after birds of the air and not

those that prefer the field. I am reminded that

we are also creatures that prefer the field.

Trust your hearing， I am told. But my hearing

isnt my best sense. And the keen sense of sight

I inherited seems strangely limited on the ground，

in this clearing where the field is ringed4

by a rampart5 of trees. Lock the target. I have

no target. Trust your hearing， he repeats.

And when I say hawk before the shadow

crosses over our heads， before sound or sight

can confirm it， I am labeled prey6

instead of hunter. The joke is that only a bird

senses the presence of a stronger bird.

You are prey， he laughs. Youre a strange bird.

When I turn quickly and fire the rifle over his head，

the distant dove suddenly forced to contend with7 gravity，

my shy hunter is as pale as an apparition8. The rifle is

an extension of the man， I respond. Somewhere

in the distance， the hawk wheels9 and disappears

into a stand10 of trees. Despite everything， he is right，

my shy hunter. I know this. I know I am prey.

我想起鸽子总是先被听见，然后

才被看到，想起步枪是人的延伸。

今天早上我想起了太多东西，

双手笨拙地举着沉重的步枪。

锁定目标，三点一线，让枪

完成它的使命。生活里的每件事

都得显得这么神秘吗？田野外有

两只野火鸡悠然踱步；它们知道

我们的目标是翱翔空中的飞禽，

而不是喜欢陆地的家伙。我想起

其实我们也是喜欢陆地的生物。

相信你的听觉，我被告知。但听觉

并不是我最强的感官。可奇怪的是，

我与生俱来的敏锐视觉在这块土地上

颇为受限，一排树木如城墙般包围着

这块空地。锁定目标。我并没有

什么目标。相信你的听觉，他重复道。

我喊了一声“鹰”，旋即一团黑影

从我们头顶掠过，声响和视线证实了

它的存在，但在我出声的那一刻，

我已被视作猎物，而非猎人。可笑的是，

只有鸟儿才能觉察到更强壮的鸟。

你是猎物，他笑道。你真是只奇怪的鸟。

当我迅速转身，向他头顶上空开枪，

远处的鸽子突然被迫与重力抗争，

我那羞怯的猎人如幽灵般苍白。步枪是

人的延伸，我回答道。在远处的

某个地方，那只鹰盘旋着，消失

于一片树丛中。不论如何，他都是对的，

我那羞怯的猎人。我知道的。我是猎物。