刘昱榆

2016年10月浙江高考首次尝试读后续写，拉开了写作题的新局面。这不仅仅给学生，同时也给老师以一个巨大的考验。那么如何写好一篇续写，如何“打动”评卷老师便成了一个新的难题。

首先我们要了解读后续写具体的评分标准。阅卷时评卷老师需要考虑以下几点：

（1）与原文以及给出的两个段首句的衔接程度;

（2）内容的丰富性与故事的合理性;

（3）应用语法结构和词汇的准确性和丰富性;

（4）上下文的连贯性。

下面以一道原創题为例，探讨如何使用两个技巧来增强内容的丰富性与故事的合理性。

阅读下面材料， 根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段， 使之构成一篇完整的短文。

Terry Erickson was a tall boy; 13， starting to fill out with muscle but still a little awkward. He was on the edge of being a good athlete， though very slowly and that bothered him. But what bothered him even more was when his fathers eyes went away. Sometimes during a meal his fathers fork would stop halfway to his mouth， just stop， and there would be a long pause while his eyes went away， far away. After several minutes his mother would reach over and take the fork and put it gently down on his plate， and they would go back to eating–or try to go back to eating–normally.

They knew what caused it. When it first started， Terry had asked his mother in private what it was， what was causing the strange behaviour.“Its from the war，”his mother had said， “The doctor at the veterans（退伍军人） hospital call it the Vietnam syndrome（综合征）.”

“Will it go away？”“They dont know. Sometimes it goes away， sometimes it doesnt. They are trying to help him.”He stopped pushing it. But it bothered him whenever it happened. His father had trouble， and he knew almost nothing of the war. There just didnt seem to be anything that could help him.

His father was sitting in the kitchen at the table. It had taken some courage， more than Terry thought he could find. Terry got a soda out of the refrigerator and popped it open. As an afterthought， he handed it to his father and got another for himself. Then he sat at the table. His father smiled.“You look serious.” Terry tightened his back and took a sip of soda.“I was wondering if we could talk about something. Dad. Vietnam.”He looked at the table， then out the window. Now his fathers eyes were gone again as Terrys heart sank. Terry pushed his soda back and forth， looking down， frightened at what was happening.

注意：

1. 续写词数应为150左右：

2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

His dad took a deep breath， trying to look for a hidden box.

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Terry felt the fear， so he reached for his fathers hand and held it.

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什么是高潮？Herrick（1902）曾定义记叙文中的高潮（climax），也可称之为转折点（turning point），为故事中最紧张以及最扣人心弦的点，在这个时间节点故事中的主人公做出了一些决定并转变了故事的局面。

了解何为高潮后，我们就应着手思考如何营造故事中的高潮。本文主要出现了三个主要人物，Terry以及他的父母亲，由给出的两个段首句可以看出这个故事主要围绕着Terry与他父亲之间展开。Terry的父亲是一位退伍军人，在日常生活中他时常出现长时间呆滞的状态，引起了Terry对父亲过去生活的好奇，并由此展开续写。

技巧一：增加外部冲突。

Bell（2014）曾提到“没有冲突就没有喜剧”，“冲突”强调的是事物的“对立性”，也是推动故事情节发展的主要动力。……