By Satarupa Bhattacharjya

From August 1stto August 15thI fasted from complaining.Yes,that’s right.No more “I’m tired” grumbles at 3 pm at the office.No more yelling at cars that cut me off on 440.No more snapping at people for not listening.The highlight of the two week period?I validated that I’m not a terrible,negative person,and optimistic people tend to live longer according to some studies.And I’m optimistic enough to believe these studies are the correct studies.

So here you go:the top five things that occurred when I stopped complaining,both the good and the bad.

1.I realized that I don’t sleep enough.The biggest complaint that I had to bite my tongue on?

“I’m tired.” Or a variation of “I’m exhausted.” American culture leaves us seeking to thrive off of no sleep and Starbucks.And is it really worth it to feel that negativity quite literally every day?I found myself almost getting annoyed with myself for being so tired.On the same note,I annoyed myself when I felt like uttering the complaint, “I’m starving.” No,Alexii.You don’t actually know what it really means to be hungry(so maybe you aren’t THAT tired either).

2.I argued less.

I’m not exactly one to pick a fight,but I noticed how many stupid arguments I can have in a week.If my fiancé Alex said something I disagreed with,I couldn’t immediately react.This helped me not snap—and more importantly it made me think before anything came out of my mouth.I’m pretty sure we’ve been told since kindergarten, “Think before you speak”but I noted how often I neglect this simplest piece of advice.

从8月1日那天起直到8月15日，我停止了对生活一切的抱怨。是的，没错。下午三点的办公室，再也不会听见我哀叹着：“我好累”。在440地区被抢了车道，我不会再大喊大叫。有人无视我的话，我也不会勃然大怒。这两周来最重要的发现是什么?我证明了自己不是个糟糕的、充满负能量的人。有研究表明乐观的人一般更长寿，而且我足够乐观，相信这些研究是正确的。

那么接下来，我想谈谈自己停止抱怨生活之后的五个变化，其中有正面的，也有负面的。

1.我意识到自己睡眠不足，这不是我以前最喜欢抱怨的吗?

“我好累”，或者，“我要累死了”。美国文化迫使我们在不足的睡眠和一杯杯咖啡中度日。每天生活在这样的负面环境中真的值得吗?连我自己都很烦恼，为什么要把自己折腾得这么累。同样，当我想要喊出“我要饿死了”的时候，也十分烦恼。不，Alexii，你并不知道什么叫真正的饿吧(所以也许你也并没有自己说得这么累)。

3.Angst builds up.

Here’s the deal:this experience was overall a positive experience for me.It truly made me reflect on my reactions to situations.That being said,sometimes people just need to vent.There was one day that I came home completely exhausted and slightly emotionally distraught.Instead of engaging in conversation with my friend that was at my house or my fiancé,I straight up shut down.It’s almost as if I didn’t know how to be positive in that moment.It was strange.And I went to bed early that night.But on a lighter note...

4.Negativity is a state of mind.

When you stop yourself from uttering negative speech,you begin to notice how negative your thought process tends to be.Sure I didn’t verbally complain when I was tired or annoyed—but I still continued thinking them.And as much as negative speech can wear you down,negative thoughts are just as dangerous.

5.I prayed more.

If I was forced to turn the negative into the positive,I turned to God.Perhaps it's from prior experience—but for whatever reason,it happened.And my spirit felt nourished.

And at the end of the day?Shit happens.After my fast from complaining,I had what may have been one of the worst days I had experienced.Imagine tough conversations that were draining but necessary (and even worse after the conversation,nothing was resolved)compiled with other people’s negativity.Then add a few “first world”problems as I like to call them—a poor night’s sleep,a shattered phone,and a stalling car.What did I do?I complained.Where did it get me?Not too far.I noted a day later that things really aren’t that bad.People have good days and people have bad days—but the truth is?It’s all about your outlook.

2.我吵架的频率变少了。

我不是那种喜欢挑事的人，但我还是会发现一周里自己有过多少次愚蠢的争吵。如果我的未婚夫艾利克斯说了一些我反对的话，我不会马上回应他。这样我就不会大声吼他，更重要的是，这样我就有时间在说话前多思考思考了。我确信从幼儿园开始，大人们就告诉我们“三思而后言”，但我觉得我还是很容易忽视这个最简单的建议。

3.焦虑感增加了。

是这样的：这种体验对我来说是有好处的，它真的使我反省自己在特定处境下的行为。话虽如此，有时人们只是需要释放情绪而已。记得有一天我回到家，身心俱疲，心烦意乱。我没有找当时在我家中的朋友或是未婚夫聊天，而是直接陷入沉默。仿佛那时我根本不知道怎样让自己乐观起来，太奇怪了。那晚我很早就睡了，但反而感觉轻松了很多……

4.负能量是一种心境。

当你不再说出那些消极的话语，你会发现自己还是会有那些消极的想法。诚然，我言语上没有抱怨疲劳或是烦躁，但我依然有着这样的想法。和消极的话语一样，消极的想法一样会消磨你的意志。

5.我尝试更多的祈祷。

如果我一定要把负能量转为正能量，我会向上帝求助。也许是从前的经验吧，不管怎样，我感受到了精神上的洗礼。

最后怎样了呢?糟糕的事情还是发生了，在我拒绝抱怨之后，我经历了非常糟的一天。想象一下：艰难的谈话使你心力交瘁(更可恶的是谈完之后什么都没有解决)，你不得不承受着别人的负能量。接着还有那些我称之为“第一世界”的麻烦困扰着你——睡眠不足，手机被摔坏，车子抛锚。我是怎么应对的?我抱怨了。持续了多久呢?没有多久，因为后来我明白其实事情也没有想象的那样不堪。世事无常嘛，关键在于你怎样看待这个世界。