◇文|田 东

世界杯已然落幕，关于世界杯本身的话题热度依旧持续。作为一个资深但并不专业的球迷，难免在面对朋友一些善意却充满戏谑味道的问题前有点手足无措。比如，内马尔穿多大码的鞋？梅西的身高精确到小数点后三位是多少？法国队的姆巴佩百米冲刺究竟有多快……打住，我想这些问题就是问贺炜、徐阳也得不到准确的回答，更别说是把加时赛时间都说错了两遍的洪钢了。

教你一个可以快速止血并且漂亮反击的武器——读一本关于本次世界杯举办地俄罗斯的前世今生的书。如果你读过，上面那些会让80%的人掩面而逃、大叫“好尴尬啊”的问题，你可以轻松化解——是的，我不知道。但你知道建立俄罗斯的是什么人吗？彼得大帝有面部肌肉痉挛的毛病，你知道这是怎么来的吗？俄罗斯历史上还有一位著名的女皇，你知道是谁吗？……

抱歉，我承认这有点抬杠的意思了。可在世界杯的热情笼罩下，知道一点关于俄罗斯的前世今生，绝对会让你在世界杯期间等待球赛开始前、中场休息和终场哨声响起之后，以及世界杯落幕后的一段时间里，显得与众不同。

当然，在欢乐而愉快的看球季中，去读那些充满历史数据外加长长又拗口的俄罗斯人名——比如彼得大帝的老爸的第一个老婆名叫玛丽·米洛斯拉夫斯卡娅——的专业历史书籍显然是不厚道甚至是残忍的。于是，经过简单的比较和选择，向你推荐一本两年前就已经有再版身份的作品——《最冷和最热的俄罗斯》。

The World Cup has already been concluded,but the talk about the World Cup continues. As a senior but unprofessional fan,it's hard to avoid being overwhelmed by friends' well-meaning but playful questions. For example,what size shoes does Neymar wear? What is Messi's height to exactly three decimal places? How fast is the French Mbappe’100-meter sprint speed? Stop,I think even He Wei and Xu Yang cannot give an accurate answer to these questions,not to mention Hong Gang who misspoke the overtime twice.

Teach you a tip that can stop the embarrassment quickly and fight back beautifully -- read a book about the past and present lives of Russia,where this World Cup is held. If you've read this book,you can easily resolve the questions that make 80% of people hide their faces and feel“embarrassment” -- Yes,I don't know. But do you know who built Russia? Peter the Great had facial muscle spasms,and do you know how this came about? There was a famous empress in the history of Russia. Do you know who she is? ……

I'm sorry that it's a bit of arguing for the sake of arguing. But knowing a little bit about Russia's past and present lives in the heat of the World Cup will definitely make you different,whenever you are waiting for the start of the game,waiting for the halftime or after the final whistle,and even for some time after the World Cup is over.

Of course,during the joyous and enjoyable season of watching football,reading professional history books filled with historical data and long,awkward-sounding Russian names --like Peter the Great's father's first wife,Mary Miloslavskaya -- is clearly unethical and even cruel. So,after a simple comparison and choice,I recommend to you a book reprinted two years ago --the coldest and hottest Russia.

看看这个名字，再看看作者的名字：杨白劳，本书走的什么路线可以猜到几分了。说什么这是“一部用当代人视野和观念写作的汉语世界史，一部好看的世界史。从俄罗斯雪原上最早定居的原始居民开始讲起，用最史学的角度、最轻松的笔触、最冷的幽默和最犀利的观点，来阐述俄罗斯的历史演变历程和政治变迁”……

在我看来，其实远远没有这么玄乎，《最冷和最热的俄罗斯》最大的声誉，就是可读性强。诙谐的语言，耍贫嘴式的调侃，让这本书的阅读门槛很低，身高低于梅西或者小四的朋友们也能很容易跨进去。当然，这也是从网帖红起来的基本条件。要知道，这书一开始原本就是杨白劳在天涯上开的帖子。面对亿万敏感而挑剔的中国网友，能吸引他们关注并一直关注下去的，肯定不是板着一张臭脸的人。

有时候为了讨网友们的欢心，为了那神圣又低下的点击率，网文作者不惜让自己扮成一个小丑。所以本书有些偏爱俄罗斯历任沙皇，特别是女沙皇的八卦也就不难理解了。

也没人说这是一部严肃的、经得起千秋万代检验的作品，能讨人一笑就不错了，要是能引起些许人对俄罗斯历史些许的探究之心，那更是善莫大焉。而且，知道俄罗斯历代女沙皇都有不少面首，并不是什么值得骄傲的事儿，可也不丢人啊。世界四大博物馆之一的冬宫是俄罗斯的一件艺术瑰宝，这其实是彼得大帝的女儿伊丽莎白享受生活的结果。这位号称俄罗斯历史上最荒淫奢侈的沙皇，一套衣服从来只穿一次，有时候她一天要换三次衣服，这让她的裙子数量超过了15000条。和她的裙子一样数量众多的，还有上面提到的面首。和大英帝国的伊丽莎白一世女王同名，也一样终身未婚的女沙皇，男朋友遍天下。

Look at the book’s name,and look at the author's name: Yang Bailao,and you can guess what the style of the book is. This is “a Chinese world history written with contemporary vision and ideas,a fascinating book of world history. Beginning with the earliest inhabitants of the Russian snowfields,the historical evolution and political changes of Russia are described from the historical perspective,and in the most relaxed style,the coldest humour and the best views.”

In my opinion,it is far from so mysterious. the coldest and hottest Russia has the greatest reputation for its readability. Witty language and funny jokes make it so easy for people to read this book. Of course,this is also a basic condition for a post on the Internet to become popular.We need to know that this book was originally written by Yang Bailao on Tianya website. In the face of hundreds of millions of sensitive and critical Chinese netizens,it is certainly not a person with a sour face that can attract their attention and make them continue to pay attention to it all the time.

Sometimes in order to win the favor of netizens,for that sacred and low click rate,the author of the website does not hesitate to dress himself up as a clown. So this book's preference for Russia's successive czars,especially the female czar’s gossip is not difficult to understand.

No one said it was a serious work that stood the test of generations. It would be nice to make people laugh. It would be even better if it makes some people to explore the history of Russia. Moreover,it is not a matter of pride to know that there have been many lovers of female czars in the past generations of Russia,but there is no shame in that either. The Winter Palace,one of the four largest museums in the world,is a treasure of Russian art. It is actually the result of the enjoyment of life by Peter the Great's daughter Elizabeth. The czar,who claims to be the most extravagant in Russian history,had never worn a suit more than once. And sometimes she changed clothes three times a day. She had over 15000 dresses,as many as her lovers mentioned above. The czar,by the same name as Queen Elizabeth I of the British Empire,was never married and had numerous boyfriends all over the world.

此外，你还可以一窥叶卡捷琳娜是怎样从一个身患残疾的德意志公主，一步步奋斗成帮助俄罗斯扩土封疆的女沙皇，被公认为俄国历史上第二位大帝——当然也能一睹她的那些男人们如何相互勾心斗角却又对她忠心不二——还有她对宝石的超乎寻常的热爱，叶卡捷琳娜登基时，特制的皇冠上镶嵌了4836颗钻石，顶部那颗世界上最大的红色尖晶石，来自中国……

自古以来的史书，皇家总是无法不成为主角。本书也是一样。不过，杨白劳并没有忘了那些在其他领域也可以称作“沙皇”的人，比如诗歌界的普希金，比如创办了莫斯科大学、让欧洲科学界对俄罗斯刮目相看的罗蒙诺索夫。此外，作为一部试图成为俄罗斯通史——或者至少是欢乐版俄罗斯通史——的图书，列宁、苏联、还有今日的俄罗斯、普金，都是杨白劳绕不过去也不会绕过去的对象。

最后提醒各位一句，读这书，你可千万别太认真。人家杨老师本来就是写着玩的，你也读着玩就行了。有些细节，有些观点，严肃的史学界本就没有定论，你也就别费力非要说个对错，硬要争个输赢了。有句老话怎么说的来着？认真，你就输了。

对了，这本书现在出了电子版，好像正在打折哟。

In addition,you can also see how Yekaterina went from a disabled German princess to a female czar who helped expand Russia's territory,recognized as the second great emperor in Russian history. And of course,you can see how her men fought against each other but were also loyal to her. And she had extraordinary love of precious stones. When Yekaterina ascended to the throne,the special crown was studded with 4836 diamonds,with the world's largest red spinel which was from China at the top.

In the history books from ancient times,the royal family could not help but become the protagonist. The same is true of this book. But Mr.Yang has not forgotten those who can also be called “czars” in other fields,such as Pushkin in poetry,such as Lomonosov,who founded Moscow University and impressed the European scientific community by Russia. Moreover,as a book that tries to become a general history of Russia--or at least a happy version of it--Lenin,the Soviet Union,and today's Russia and Putin,are the objects that Yang Bailao cannot and will not ignore.

Finally,I would like to remind you that you need not take this book too seriously. Mr.Yang wrote it for fun,and you need not to be that serious. Historians have no final conclusion on some details and views,and you should not struggle to judge whether it is right or wrong. What's the old saying? You take it seriously,you fail.

By the way,the book is now available in electronic form. It seems to be on sale!