（一）

A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says, “God, what is a million dollars to you?” God says, “A penny.” Then the man says, “God, what is a million years to you?” God says, “a second.” Then the man says, “God, can I have a penny?” and God says, “In a second.”

一男子进入教堂和上帝对话。他问:“主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?”上帝回答:“一便士。”男子又问:“那一百万年呢?”上帝说:“一秒钟。”最后男子请求道:“上帝,我能得到一便士吗?”上帝回答:“过一秒钟。”

（二）

Father: Oh, oh, I think I just made an illegal right-hand turn.

Susie: That is okay, Dad, the policeman behind you just did the same thing!

父亲：哎呀，我刚才违规右转弯了。

苏西：没事，爸爸，跟在你后面的警察也这么转了。

(三)

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. “What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?”

“I gave it to a poor old woman,” he answered.

“Youre a good boy,” said the mother proudly. “Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?”

“She is the one who sells the candy.”

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”

“我给了一个可怜的老太婆。”他回答说。“你真是一个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”

“她是个卖糖果的。”