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The Transformative Joy of Rereading 重读之新趣

2021-08-12胡安·维达尔文张英译

英语世界 2021年7期
关键词:空难老友书籍

胡安·维达尔文 张英译

Returning to a book youve read multiple times can feel like drinks with an old friend. Theres a welcome familiarity—but also sometimes a slight suspicion that time has changed you both, and thus the relationship. But books dont change, people do. And thats what makes the act of rereading so rich and transformative.

If youve been an avid reader for any amount of time, chances are youve revisited a book you love. A novel with interesting characters, that story collection that reminds you of home, a volume of poems you were given as a child. Whether its nostalgia or simple pleasure we seek varies from person to person. But one thing is for certain: Every book is a reason in and of itself.

The number of books I receive every month can be glorious and daunting. It might be five, but it could be 20. And they all look damn beautiful, what with their unique designs, gripping blurbs, and freshly dried ink. Stories chock-full of murder, secrets, and political intrigue, novellas that seem to carry the weight of the world. Sure, I want to read them all, but thats impossible. I have children and a wife and dinner and Ive been putting off getting an oil change for far too long. But also because, see, in addition to selected new releases, I really want to have that drink with the old friend.

There are three books I reread annually. These are the shoo-ins, books that I specifically set time aside for during the year. The first, which I breeze through every spring, is Ernest Hemingways A Moveable Feast. Published posthumously in 1964, its his classic memoir of 1920s Paris. The language is almost intoxicating, an aging writer recalling an ambitious yet simpler time.

Another is Annie Dillard1s Holy the Firm, her poetic 1975 ramble about everything and nothing; a moth consumed in a flame, a baptism, a little girl burned in an airplane accident. It begins: “Every day is a god, each day is a god, and holiness holds forth in time. I worship each god, I praise each day splintered down and wrapped in time like a husk, a husk of many colors spreading, at dawn fast over the mountains split.” I wouldnt say theres a “plot,” per se, but perhaps its the disfigurement of 7-year-old Julie Norwich in that accident. Anyway, if you need a neatly fleshed out plot to enjoy a book theres a pretty good chance youre a sociopath.

The third book is Julio Cortázar2s Save Twilight: Selected Poems, because poetry. And because Cortázar.

While I tend to buy a lot of books, these three were given to me as gifts, which might subconsciously add to the meaning I attach to them. But I imagine that, while money is indeed wonderful and necessary, rereading an authors work is the highest currency a reader can pay them. Especially if the author is no longer around to spend money.

A voracious reader is a non-stop consumer of worlds. But ones interpretation of these worlds morphs and shifts depending on the personal experiences one brings into the reading. We identify with a characters pain because weve felt pain, and so on. The beauty of rereading lies in the idea that our engagement with the work is based on our current mental, emotional, and even spiritual register. Its true, the older I get, the more I feel time has wings. But with reading, its all about the present. Its about the now and what one contributes to the now, because reading is a give and take between author and reader. Each has to pull their own weight. There are books I hated in my early 20s that I now see as powerful and revelatory.

The best books are the ones that open further as time passes. But remember, its not because they changed. Every letter and punctuation mark is exactly where it always has been, and where it will remain forever. Its you who are different; its you whove been affected by the depth of your experience. And its you that have to grow and read and reread in order to better understand your friends.

重读已读多遍的书籍,就像与老友对酌。觉得亲切而愉悦,但有时也略感时光已然改变书与人,以及两者的关系。然而,书不会变,变的是人。这正是重读旧书如此富有内涵且时历时新的原因。

如果你酷爱阅读,不论时间长短,多半已重读了自己喜欢的书籍,可能是人物有趣的小说,可能是引人思乡的故事集,也可能是儿时所得的诗卷,或找寻旧日情怀,或追求纯粹欢愉,因人而异。但有一点无可置疑:每一本书本身就是理由。

每月我收到的书,册数可观,让人望而却步,或5本,20册亦有可能。每一本都设计别致,护封吸睛,墨迹新鲜,精美绝伦。诚然,面对充满谋杀、秘密、政治阴谋的故事,面对容纳大千世界的中篇小说,我欲一览而尽,却犹如煎水作冰。不仅有妻儿需陪伴、晚宴需赴约、机车换油保养已推迟许久等事由,更有其他缘故:除结识精选的新书之外,我着实想与老友共饮一番了。

每年,我都会特地空出时间,必去重读3本书。每年春天,我欣然翻阅的第一本书是海明威的《流动的盛宴》。这部讲述20世纪20年代巴黎生活的经典回忆录,在他逝世后于1964年出版。渐入暮年的作家以其几近令人陶醉的语言,回味了那段充满雄心壮志却更加简单纯粹的时光。

第二本是安妮·迪拉德的《神圣的坚实》。这部1975年创作的诗意随笔,无所不涉,笔触空灵,比如扑火的飞蛾、基督教的洗礼和空难中被烧伤的小女孩。其开篇写道:“每一天如神灵降临,日日如此,神圣之感源源不断如期而至。我崇拜每一位神,我赞美每一天,时光散落又聚合,宛如色彩斑斓的果荚,在黎明时分快速拂过座座高山。”虽然这部作品本身并无情节可言,但7岁的朱莉·诺威奇因空难而毁容一事或许极具戏剧性。总之,倘若没有精心构思的丰富情节便体会不到读书的乐趣,那你很可能心理失常。

第三本是胡利奥·科塔萨尔的《拯救黄昏:诗歌精选》,因为诗歌也因为科塔萨尔。

虽然我经常大量买书,这3本却是他人惠赠之礼,不觉间或许会赋予它们更多意义。我想,金钱固然美好且重要,但重读书籍,特别是在作者已逝、再无用度之需的情况下,是读者对他们的最好回报。

对阅读如饥似渴的读者,不停地体验着不同的世界。而一个人对世界的解读,因其带入阅读的个人经历的不同而有所变化发展。我们之所以能体会书中人物的痛苦,是因为我们经历过痛苦,对其他情绪的共情也是如此。重读之美在于,阅读作品的体验取决于我们当下的心理、情感,乃至精神状态。诚然,年岁愈增,愈觉得光阴如飞。但说到阅读,那就是当下的事——事关今时和对今时的意义,因为阅读就是作者和读者之间的予与取,双方都应各尽本分。20岁出头时,我对一些书感到厌恶,如今读来却觉得振聋发聩,有拨云见日之感。

那些随着时间推移而愈加深邃的书就是好书。但请注意,这并非因为书有什么变化。书中的每个字母和标点依旧如初,也将恒久不变。发生变化的是你,人生阅历的增加对你产生了影响。为了更好理解你的这些朋友,你必须不断成长,一读再读。

(译者单位:湖南师范大学)

1(1945—),美国作家,以叙事散文闻名,创作范围广泛,涉及散文、诗歌、小说和书信,皆直指生命的核心。文字细致精练,呈现出敏銳的观察和充满哲思的想象。

2(1914—1984),阿根廷著名作家,短篇小说大师,拉丁美洲“文学爆炸”代表人物。

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